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by Sally Isok
Of all communications skills, listening can have a huge impact on your ability to communicate and ultimately influence.
The most brilliant and effective speaker ultimately fails when he/she fails to listen properly.
Listening does not come naturally to most people, so we need to work hard at it; to stop ourselves ‘jumping in’ and giving our opinions.
Mostly, people don’t listen – they just take turns to speak – we all tend to be more interested in announcing our own views and experiences than really listening and understanding others.
It’s pretty normal since we all like to be listened to and understood. Because when we are understood we feel important and respected.
In order to be successful in any business and in life we need to be more effective communicators. I assume in order to be fully engaged in listening and understanding the importance of empathy is not deniable. Understanding other person’s position, feelings means leaving your own self-created box at least for some time. Being able to achieve detachment from your own believes will create a solid ground for a better communication. Ability to listen without judgement makes us an effective listener. Another definition for an effective communication is empathy. Empathy doesn’t mean to give up on your own believes or principles, it is the ability to understand another person. Of course it’s easy to have empathy if you have been in a similar situation yourself.
In a business environment such as Sales, it’s easy to handle the empathy since all Sellers are Buyers at some point. Seller should sell by following his own buying pattern. While he follows those patterns it is not difficult at all to listen with empathy and be successful.
If a seller manages to listen without any ongoing conversation on his head, analyzing very word heard, thinking about what to say next or what customer to visit next, the solution offered to a Buyer will be the most suitable and valuable. Being distracted by his/her own thoughts, feelings, and biases will never allow Seller to serve the Buyer with integrity. Integrity in its turn will lead to trust and building an excellent rapport with the customer who is not a customer anymore, but a partner!!!
About the author